Why You Shouldn't Be Here
You're on the edge of sanity, friend. Literally. The abyss is staring back at you, judging you. It's like that one friend who's always right, but never there for you.
We've got a special deal for you. It's called "Sink or Swim." You can either take the plunge or just, you know, swim back to your life. We're not really invested in either option.
But don't worry, we've got some fine print for you to read while you're contemplating the meaninglessness of existence:
- Our apologies for the inconvenience, but the snacks in the break room are all gone.
- We're not really sure what "do not pass go" means, but it's not a good sign.
- Please do not attempt to reenact the entirety of "The Exorcist" in our break room.
So, what's it going to be? Sink or swim? The abyss is waiting.
Option A: Sink Like a StoneOption B: Just Go Ahead, We Won't Tell
Option C: Just Pretend You're a Responsible Adult